The First Cries of Manipulation…

Attempts to control our own world begin with the first breath of life. A baby’s natural cry, the cry for attention, represents the first efforts at getting our needs met. Over the years, children can learn to use manipulative tears to get their way within their little circle of life. As we grow into adults, we develop highly refined personal skills for meeting our needs by taking matters into our own hands and manipulating people and events around us. These methods of control are so deeply ingrained that we lack personal insight into our own deceptive behavior. Most of us are more aware of the manipulation of others than of our own “string-pulling.” But maturity demands that we lay bare before God our need to control and that we begin the process of trusting the One who is in ultimate control.

“Some trust in chariots and some in horses, but we trust in the name of the LORD our God.” -Psalm 20:7

Q: “How do I know whether I am being manipulated?”

Evaluate: Am I doing this because I fear someone else’s disapproval or because it is the right thing for me to do?

“Am I now seeking the approval of man, or of God? Or am I trying to please man? If I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant of Christ.” -Galatians 1:10

Q: “I know I’m being manipulated, so why do I stay in the relationship?”

Each person has God-given needs for love, for significance, and for security. A desperate fear of rejection often paralyzes a person who is trying to make healthy decisions.1

“I sought the LORD, and he answered me and delivered me from all my fears.” -Psalm 34:4

Key Verse to Memorize

“Am I now seeking the approval of man, or of God? Or am I trying to please man? If I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant of Christ.” -Galatians 1:10

Key Passage to Read and Reread

1 Thessalonians 2:3–8

Click here for the PDF version of the complete Manipulation Resource Guide provided by Hope for the Heart.