Healing the Pain of an Affair…

Has your life been gripped by the agony of adultery? Has your life been forever changed because of the snare of an affair? Marriage was God’s idea. A lifelong commitment to the marriage is God’s requirement. According to His Word, God will judge those who break the marriage covenant. The painful lessons of adultery are taught only too well in the story of the most famous adulterer in history, King David. The fact that David is remembered as a great king and a man after God’s own heart (1 Samuel 13:14) shows the completeness of God’s healing after a terrible affair. But David had to deal with the consequences of his disobedience—family crimes, political upheaval, violence, and death—all the days of his life.

“Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous.” -Hebrews 13:4

Q: “My husband was unfaithful to me last year. Is it possible for me to ever trust him again? Is it possible for him to change?”

It is possible for your husband to regain your trust. First he must develop a godly sorrow over his lack of commitment to you and the marriage covenant. Then he needs to identify the key that opened the door to adultery. By both admitting and understanding his weaknesses, he could receive major help to prevent him from walking through that door again. Pray that he will see his sin as God sees it and hate his sin as God hates it. It is entirely possible for God to change anyone who is willing to have a changed heart.

“Nothing will be impossible with God.” -Luke 1:37

Q: “How should I pray for my husband, who has left me and is involved in an adulterous relationship?”

Your husband needs to be convicted so that he will see his need to turn from his sinful lifestyle to a sacrificial lifestyle that brings glory to God. Rather than praying for God to bless him, pray that God will withhold blessings from him until he repents. Pray that your husband can’t help but be miserable . . . that he would have such a heaviness of heart— such piercing guilt—that he would be driven out of the arms of this other woman and into the arms of God. Ask God to bring whatever sorrow is necessary to bring him back to his senses and bring him to his knees before God.

“Godly grief produces a repentance that leads to salvation without regret, whereas worldly grief produces death.” -2 Corinthians 7:10

Key Verses to Memorize

For the faithful partner:

“Your Maker is your husband, the LORD of hosts is his name; and the Holy One of Israel is your Redeemer, the God of the whole earth he is called.” -Isaiah 54:5

For the unfaithful partner:

“Flee from sexual immorality. Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body.” -1 Corinthians 6:18

Key Passage to Read and Reread

For the faithful partner:
Romans 12:9–21

For the unfaithful partner:
Colossians 3:1–15

Click here for the PDF version of the complete Adultery & Infidelity Resource Guide provided by Hope for the Heart.